Ah! The million-dollar question. If only I were given a dollar every time someone asked me this question! So I have decided to consolidate all my thoughts regarding this topic into a single post.
What's the basic philosophy behind "Friendship"? You think you've understood it in-and-out! C.S.Lewis says, "Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, 'What! You too? I thought I was the only one.'" So, is "similarity" the X-factor holding the bond of friendship together? Do "birds of feather" actually "flock together"? The answer is yes, they do. But wait a minute! Aren't we forgetting the basic law that works in the nature all around us: "Opposites attract!" If you were thinking that this law applies just to the field of Physics and EE, then think again! How often do you see people with totally contradicting natures being the best of friends? The answer is mostly, "Many". Is the philosophy behind "Friendship" easy to grasp? I think NO! We, most often than not, do not have a clear black-and-white answer as to why a person is our best friend. The answer is always in the gray area.
Having gotten a small glimpse of the picture, let's now consider friendship between a boy and a girl. Maybe the girl lent the new-boy-in-class her pencil while others were busy teasing him; or maybe the boy shared his home-made lunch with the girl who was given just biscuits for lunch. The reason for the genesis is immaterial. The fact is that the innocent and humble beginnings transform into a healthy friendship with time. The friendship matures, yet retaining its innocence in teasing one another, hiding others' stuffs, fighting over silly issues, and the list goes on and on. One important point to note, from my personal experience, is that a guy and a girl make the best of friends. Period. I am unable to justify this claim, but I know it's true. So though a girl may have have umpteen other friends, its with this guy best friend that she is most at ease and can be totally herself. Does this feeling mean that she loves him? NO! Same applies for the guy. So at the end of a really long day, the two can hang out, chat like there is going to be no tomorrow, discuss about every single event that took place that day, their secrets for the day, their crushes, their dreams (and I mean the ones that you see while sleeping :P) and probably more of JB (from the girl's side) and more of KS (from the guy's side); then return to their homes and go to sleep satisfied that the day is finally complete. Does all this imply a budding love? The answer is still NO!
So now you must've understood what I am getting at. My answer is YES! A guy and a girl can be "just friends" FOREVER and EVER. Your next question is now, "How is that every guy-girl friend pair that I see develops "love" love and eventually ends up seeing each other?" One of my personal theories is that "Our life partner is always our best friend, but our best friend can never and should be never our life partner." Coming back to the question. I don't know how much this answer applies in a non-Indian context. How is a guy-girl friend pair received in India, by other friends, parents and society in general. The friends tease the pair, fill the walls of schools and colleges with their names, pass comments in the class, and make them a center of attention of everyone, including the teachers and profs. As if this wasn't enough, they personally talk to them and raise up false feelings for the other. The same mind that thought, "We're the best of friends and nobody can come between us.", now starts thinking, "Does he/she really like me?", "What if what they are saying is true?"; and with that goes the freedom and comfort in the friendship. Indian society, in general, is also still uncomfortable about a guy-girl friend pair. If a guy and a girl are seen at a coffee shop or in a restaurant, laughing and talking, the immediate assumption is that they are in a "committed relationship". So the reception from the society is also corrupting. Parents contribution is very interesting in this. Many parents (and I am blessed to have such parents) understand the sacredness of such a friendship and are welcome. But some are, sadly not. The immediate response when they meet an opposite sex best friend of their child, is anger. This anger makes them force their kids, into not meeting their "friend" again. What does this do? Aren't they corrupting the minds of their own kids? What could have been a wonderful friendship, is now at the verge of becoming a "committed relationship".
So as we can clearly see(from my point of view :P), as long as their minds are not corrupted by third parties, a guy and girl can be "just friends" FOREVER and EVER.I end with another quote of C.S.Lewis,"Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather is one of those things that give value to survival."
